We get it, you want a night to celebrate without the distraction and limitations of children. Let’s face it the decision may ruffle some feather but guess what, thats okay! No couple should feel bad for wanting a child free wedding day. That being said, we thought you may need a few pointers on the subject.
You can sugar coat it all you want, but the more you try to “imply” the request the higher chance someone is brining little Johnny to your wedding. Ive heard some people say, simply address the invitation to the parents, but it would be easy for a parent to assume you were including their child in that invite. A clear wording is the best and most effective way to ensure someone doesn’t bring their child to your celebration. I really love this clear cut example I found while doing some research “In order to allow all guest, including parents, and evening of relaxation we have chosen for our wedding day to be an adult only occasion.” After reading a straight forward request there should be no misunderstanding of your wishes (and if they still show up with little Johnny you can give them the stink eye all night long, Just kidding! Or am I?)
Wedding Websites are a wonderful place for a guest to get all the information they need for your wedding day, so make sure to reiterate your wishes on your website. If you have already requested no children and you have followed that request up with adding it to your website a guest would find it very hard to say “I’m so sorry I didn’t realize children were not invited.”
Please heed this advice otherwise you just may end up in the middle of some very uncomfortable drama. No children means NO CHILDREN. If you start bending the rules and allow some guests to bring their children while you do not allow others you are probably going to offend some guests. With that being said…
Don’t feel like your sweet cousin Katie can’t be your flower girl just because you have made your wedding child free. There is nothing wrong with having a flower girl, ring bearer, or even junior bridesmaids and groomsmen. You need to keep in mind however that once it’s time for the reception the parents need to have daycare provided for the evening (refer back to DON’T BEND THE RULES.)
It’s your big day! Go into this knowing some guests may give you a sob story of why they really need to bring their child, DON’T BACK DOWN! Trust me a parent may be a little “salty” at first that they couldn’t bring their adorable child and had to shell out for daycare, but my guess is a few drinks in, they will be singing your praises. Parents sometimes don’t realize how much they need a child-free night out until they experience one (take it from a mom of three.)
Though I support any couple who wants a child free wedding if you plan to have out of town guest you may need to keep in mind finding child care in a different state can prove hard. No parent wants to leave their child in an unfamiliar city with a complete stranger. Maybe they have family in town, thats great, but you need to understand not everyone will. If you plan to invite out of state guest with children it’s a good idea to consider hiring on site childcare for your wedding day. It’s a win-win! You get your child free wedding, the couple gets a few hour to themselves, and the child is being taken care of.